As a journalist, I’m trained to notice even the most subtle sign that something is out of the ordinary.
An awkward glance.
A hesitant word.
A 65-year-old man reading Cosmopolitan…
To the man I saw reading this magazine while getting his blood pressure checked at Fred Meyer: I’m no doctor, but it’s possible your elevated blood pressure reading probably has nothing to do with that extra piece of bacon you ate this morning…
Ned's Blog 
Maybe he was attempting to get a “rise” out of his blood pressure.
Haha! I think it’s possible the cuff was the only thing keeping him from sliding out of the chair.
My dad has congestive heart failure and has dangerously low BP. My mom should buy him a couple of Cosmos!
Lol! If so, you might want to keep a defibrillator handy, too.
Testing his medication? Whatever medication that may be…
Yes. That would explain all the little blue pills on the floor…
I hope you scooped up the blue pills–they may cum in handy someday.
Hopefully I’ll never have to be that “handy.”
Are you suggesting that perhaps a different piece of meat was the culprit?
HA! Let’s just say I’m glad the BP machine didn’t have a curtain.
That certainly would have made for a sticky situation.
Another reason I didn’t become a pharmacist. Oh, and I can’t spell big words.
Or read the doctors’ handwriting…
Exactly. Besides, they just write like that to hide the fact they can’t spell.
Too bad there’s not way to hide that when typing… I mean, at least phones have autocorrect to blame.
That’s uh fantastik Eyedia! I weel start fineing inveestors!
He reads it for the recipes?
Yep. Just like Maxim.
I saw the title of your blog in a post feed on Facebook. The use of ‘Fred Meyer’ in your title caught my eye – I live in Bend. (I fled east of the Valley/Coast cause I finally rusted out!)
I have enjoyed checking out your site. I love your bio! Good humor gets me every time! I look forward to checking out more of your site and writings.
Thank you so much, Lynn! It’s always a special treat to hear from a fellow webfoot, and Bend is one of my favorite place to visit. Thanks for the kind words, and for reading 😉
No magazine for the women? Geez.
Sexism at its worst I’m afraid…
So funny. My conspiracy theory is that the store plants it there to ‘get the numbers up’ and then can sell you your blood pressure meds.
Excellent theory, Beth. I think it’s the same principle behind the Chinese food in the deli that makes you need to purchase Pepto.
As a qualified healthcare professional I can confidently say that the magazine was planted there to simply provide him a list of dos and don’ts and what not to wear to his next visit with his doctor.
As a poor writer, that may have just been the longest sentence I’ve ever written. Yet another qualification to become a healthcare professional.
I wish I had your confidence, Michelle…
Drinking helps 🙂
Cheers to that 😉
Hey… I feel more confident already!
I wonder if he checked his bp twice?
Assuming he’s still alive.
Ha that’s true he could have gone out happy
Paging Dr. Hickson….
“We need the current issue of Cosmo — STAT!”