Reasons even a straight man can benefit from watching The Bachelor

image (I had the laps in judgement distinct privilege of being a guest contributor over at Long Awkward Pause today. Here’s an excerpt, along with a link at the bottom. Sorry it’s not the sausage kind…)

Hi.

My name is Ned and I watch The Bachelor.

I’ve been a heterosexual for 17,155 days and counting.

I can see the looks of confusion but that’s okay; I’ve gotten used to it. In fact, I used to hide my Bachelor/Bachelorette watching…

“Hey Ned, how about that Trailblazers game last night?!?”
“Yeah, man! They really dominated the paint!”
“What are you talking about? They LOST!”
“Oh, right. Uh, I got tapped out for a house fire and missed the second half.”
“Was everyone ok?”
“Yeah, but the girls who didn’t get a rose were pretty upset.”
“Wait… what?”

(Read the rest at Long Awkward Pause…)

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Ned's Blog

I was a journalist, humor columnist, writer and editor at Siuslaw News for 23 years. The next chapter in my own writer’s journey is helping other writers prepare their manuscript for the road ahead. I'm married to the perfect woman, have four great kids, and a tenuous grip on my sanity...

7 thoughts on “Reasons even a straight man can benefit from watching The Bachelor”

  1. Just once, I would love to see a season of The Bachelor or The Bachelorette where everyone is in their 70s.

    Her: I’m giving you a rose
    Him: *wiping* What about my nose?
    Her: No, no. The flower
    Him: I dunno. 5 o’clock, maybe
    Her: What baby?
    Him: Pat’s got rabies?
    Her: Who the hell is Pat?

    Bachelors aren’t eliminated so much as die.

No one is watching, I swear...

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