It started with an instant message from a blogger friend about another blogger who is trying to escape an abusive relationship. Her options? Stay where she is in the eye of the hurricane or take to the streets in hopes of finding somewhere to weather the storm.
Fortunately for this young woman, one of her friends is Not a PunkRocker. And by that I don’t mean all her other friends are punkrockers and she’s lucky that one of them isn’t. Because we all know too many punkrockers spoil the broth. Or how many punkrockers it takes to screw in a lightbulb.
What I DO know is that Jeanette at Not a Punkrocker… well, she rocks. She took it upon herself to not only spread the word about her friend’s need for help, she also opened up about her own experience as a victim— and how the constant mental and physical manipulation slowly destroys you from the inside out. Often to the point that seeing a way out is next to impossible because the light needed to see your way has been extinguished.
Jeanette has never met her blogger friend (who I am keeping anonymous because her abuser follows blogs as well). The term “blogger friend” is sometimes looked upon the same way as “imaginary friend.” Or “sock puppet” with “pigtails that you spend too much time braiding” when “you should be finding a job” and “moving out of your mother’s basement.” But the truth is, as I’ve discovered during the ongoing “Performance of the Year” competition at The Public Blogger, there is nothing imaginary about the support we receive within our blogging community.
Jeanette is a perfect example. She took it upon herself to establish a Go-Fund-Me account in her own name for her friend, who is in dire need of has housing so that she can get out of the living situation with her abuser. News travels fast in the blog-sphere. So do stories about naughty time, but I digress. The point is, people are already beginning to help, and all of this is the result of blogger friends coming together to help each other.
There’s nothing imaginary about that.
But she still needs help to make this happen. You can donate by following the link below to the Go-Fund-Me account set up by Not a Punkrocker for her friend. If you can’t help with a donation,consider passing this along or reblogging it to helpspread the word. It’s pretty amazing what we can do when we put our imaginations together…
To help, please Click Here…
Regardless, I’m proud to call all of you my friends. Imaginary or otherwise.
(Ned Hickson is a syndicated columnist with News Media Corporation and a member of the writing team at Long Awkward Pause. This has been an excerpt from his first book, Humor at the Speed of Life, is available from Port Hole Publications, Amazon.com or Barnes & Noble.)
86 thoughts on “Because unlike my sockpuppets, blogging friendships are anything but “imaginary””
Thank you, Ned… for once again helping someone in such a devastating place, for your ready support of your friends, and for noting that although avatars represent us, we are very much real people behind the words.
I am so proud to be able to call you, friend.
You are a true champion of a cause that is near to my heart, Robyn. I’m very appreciative knowing the person behind the words is the same one who stands in front of them 😉
This is a wonderful shout out and a great story.
I never imagined such a supportive community existed online, and especially never guessed I would make real friends from blogging, but that’s exactly what’s happened. Not only people who support me online, who I consider friends, but even those who I’ve talked to over a glass of wine (or five).
Thank you for being a part of my community 🙂
So true, and likewise, Ann.
Sorry again about the wine…
Why are you apologizing about wine?
Good point. Clearly I’ve already had too much…
I was trying to remember if you’d ever stood me up…
If I had, I’m sure there would have been a good reason. Like the apocalypse or or a meteor striking the planet.
That’s what it would take on my end!!
After 5 glasses of wine it’s hard to remember if they stood you up or carried you out prone… Bwahaha!
A man who could carry all 5’10 of me would be rather memorable…
At 6’3″ and 250 pounds, at one point I used to deliver kegs of beer to bars- 145 pounds in each hand down into basements -for a living. Mind I’m only that strong in my mind now, but hey…
*fans her flushed face*
As a firefighter, that’s one of the things we train for…
Fanning flushed faces? That sounds like pretty stressful; training. 😀
Hey, it gets hot in there!
Amen, my friend! I consider fellow bloggers friends the same way I would those I know in my day to day life. We all have common interests (writing/blogging being the obvious) and we all, in some way, look out for one another. It’s an amazing thing.
Sending so much love out to you for your kindness and to the young lady who is need of help. She is in my thoughts and prayers.
Thank you for that, Kim 😉
My daughter is always saying to me that blogger friends/twitter friends are imaginary, but I’ve met quite a few in person, even had one come and stay at my house for 3 weeks. There is a lot of support out there, and I do consider blogger friends to be real, and amazingly helpful when support is needed.
So very true and I’m glad to hear it! I’m making a maple syrup run your way and may need your couch…
We have two couches, 🙂
As long as my wife and I can put them together 😉
Reblogged this on Kate McClelland.
Thank you, Kate!
Wonderful, supportive post. Bloggers are real people, very real.
Yes indeed 😉
Behind every blog is a real person who cares and has courage enough to write it. And thank goodness the anonymous blogger is embarking on the very difficult journey out of an abusive relationship. The support of friends like you, Not A Punk Rocker, and a caring blogosphere makes an enormous difference.
So true, Karen! It’s a beautiful thing when we bloggers can use our powers for good. Instead of the fart jokes I usually use mine for…
Thank you Ned!! From one survivor to another
That’s great news that she’s out. I hadn’t heard that!
I just saw it a while ago on Lizzi’s FB update 😉 Yay!
She’s says she’s not quite out but working on it. Another update.
That was my fault; I misinterpreted something Lizzi had posted about a friend in a similar situation looking for housing. It seems there’s a reason we established a Domestic Violence Awareness Month. Sadly…
Oh yes I saw that. It is really sad. 😦
I fixed it in the post for anyone else who comes along,but yes— very much a bummer. Keeping positive thoughts foir her…
Well if I could reach…
where did I put that ladder…
You’re standing on it…
HA! I walked into that one. And boy,does my head hurt *ba-DU-bum*
You so did. Hope you didn’t get a concussion!
I don’t have as much cash to donate as I’d like, but I can share the story in an effort to generate a little more support, and I have done so. See my comment on the blog “Three’s A Herd”, talking about blogging friendships: http://threesaherd.com/2015/10/23/friday-favorites-9/
Hope it helps some.
We all give what we can, in the best way we can. You can’t hope or ask for more than that 😉
This is wonderful. They do often say that friends are family we choose. I’ll keep this post until I am able to donate. I have often wished I could create some sort of nonprofit to raise money for women in these situations, as I know personally I’d have left my situation a lot sooner if I had been financially able to do so.
That’s a perfect way to look at it, Tara. Certainly, our blogger family is a chosen one. And I’m very appreciative to be among them. I’m so glad you were able to get out of that situation; and wish it had been sooner as well. No one should have to live like that.
I have no doubt that you, or Lizzi, or Gibber, or whoever else got that message on that day, in that moment, would have done the same.
Thank you for sharing this and for being you, Ned. ❤
Still, what you did was a beautiful thing for a sweet person; I’m very thankful to know you both.
I shudder at the thought of what you do with your sock puppets when nobody else is around, but I agree about blogger friends. They are actually quite amazing, for the most part.
So are my sock puppets…
They’re also good IN REAL, yo!
(I say this to tease cos Don refused to meet me)
Probably didn’t want to share his puppets…
Nah. That or he was too worried I’d find that he for REALS had a stick up his ass… 😉
I should think so too! The chance to meet me was squandered with “I can’t – I’m drunk now” PFFFFFFTTTT!
His loss — and it sounds like your gain.
*grins* perhaps, though I rather love the guy, asshole as he is…
Thanks for sharing the story and doing your part to help. WP has developed us into a very tight-knit community!
It has, hasn’t it? On my bucket list is to host a giant gathering of bloggers. Or possibly a gathering of giant blogers. I can’t make up my mind… 😉
Either way….I hope I’m invited. (note to self: buy platform shoes and gain 50 lbs)
Hahaha! You’re invited either way.
You’re a good, good man, Ned 🙂 Thank you for sharing this very important, life-changing campaign.
Thank YOU for being the kind of person willing to help change a life 😉
🙂 Well, we need more people like those, right?
I’m just glad to know so many of ’em
Wait… you have imaginary sock puppets??? That is a whole new kind of weird.
I try to stay above the curve in that area…
well played then
Thank you for spreading the word!
My pleasure 😉
Thank you so very much for writing this post Ned. It saddens me how many live in fear and abuse. I heartily support anything we can do to change that. It is important that we make it clear that we are there for them. This issue is the big elephant under the table in our “free” society – domestic abuse and violence are of epidemic proportions. If it were a disease with the injury and fatality rate of abuse, we would be screaming from the roof tops for solutions. As it is, it is swept under the rug – primarily because those who hold the power are often the abusers.
Thank you again from the bottom of my soul Ned. (And thank your imaginary sock puppets.)
Your analogy really hits home, Paul. Well said, my friend.
beautiful. shows the power of individuals in reaching out and helping another. you can make a difference in someone’s life.
It’s good to be reminded of that from time to time 😉
I’m a new blogger and really enjoyed that blog thank you
Welcome to the blog-o-spere, CM, and thank you for the kind words!
Your welcome and thank you this may become my new addiction
Is there any update? 🙂
It’s my wife’s birthday so I’ve been off the grid until now. But I haven’t gotten an update yet. I will keep you posted 😉
Done, and shared. Brilliant use of your blog. Don’t need to say more. Thank you.
I met my best friend through blogging and she moved continents, coincidently to mine, so now we get to drink wine and give supportive hugs for real 😊
We all blog for a reason and often it is a cry for help. I feel for the blogger trying to escape and hope she achieves what she needs to do
And thanks for being a friend Ned!
Lol! That’s terrific, C&S 😉 I don’t know if you’re aware of The Sisterwives, but that’s a group of amazing ladies who are all bloggers who recently met in person for the first time. Yours and theirs are great examples of the kinds of friendships that can happen through words 😉