After taking a good look at this photo, I know what most of you are probably thinking:
His real name is Edward? Hahahaha!
But don’t forget, there is an entire generation of Twilight babies out there named Edward.
Or Jacob. And man, do those Jacob babies have some freakishly developed abs.
However, the real point of this post is to share with you that, this morning, I officially signed a contract with Port Hole Publishing for my second book, Pearls of Writing Wisdom from 16 Shucking Years as a Columnist. This is an important step beyond what had previously been me unofficially talking about my soon-to-be-published book with strangers, sipping directly from a vodka bottle while hunched over an empty bowl of peanuts at the bar. It also means that in order to meet my September publication date, I need to get the finished manuscript to my publisher by mid June.
So…
Gotta Go!
Just kidding. It’s not that bad.
I actually have a good start because, as a lot of you know, portions of it come from the weekly Ned’s Nickel’s Worth on Writing, which I posted here each Friday until I got caught for a couple of years. However, unlike Humor at the Speed of Life, it’s a book written specifically for writers. Think of it as a “writer’s survival guide” of sorts, offering insights and inspiration as well as tips and advice. I’m having a lot of fun putting it together, and I hope it’ll be just as much fun to read. I’m also including a strip of freshly cooked bacon as a bookmark. So there’s that, too.
(Note: Out of respect for readers in Canada, their bookmark will actually be a thin circle of ham)
To meet my June deadline, I will have to buckle down a little so that the manuscript is as polished as possible when I turn it over to my book editor, the lovely Carol Gunderson, who will then thoughtfully go through it — along with an entire box of red markers.
So between now and June 15, my posts here may be a bit sporadic, and possibly limited to my weekly newspaper column…
*waits for collective sigh of disappointment*
*clears throat to cover awkward silence*
I just wanted to keep you in the loop; but I especially wanted to take a moment to say “Thank You” for all of your continued support and encouragement. Particularly over this past year, which has been full of blessings, challenges and growing pains. And not just because of all the bacon donuts. Trying to keep a healthy balance while taking on more projects and opportunities has been challenging, and I truly appreciate your patience, understanding and support as I’ve fumbled along. Thanks for sticking with me, especially after seeing me in a red thong.
I promise that won’t make the cover of this book…
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Ned's Blog 
Congrats on the book deal. Look forward to reading it when released.
Thank you, Shiela 😉
In my best Phoebe Buffay voice, “My eye!!” (thinking about that red thong). A hearty congratulations (raising a glass to you) on the imminent publication of your next book!
I could TOTALLY hear that, Susan! Hahaha! Thanks so much *raises glass in return*
Congratulations, Ned! I love the title of your new book!
Thanks, Lennard! I wasn’t sure they’d go for it, but I managed to slip it past… just like most of my high school assignments.
Congrats! You’ve earned it! 🙂
Thank you, Jenn 😉
Congrats on the new book Ned – Tally Ho! You are riding into the hallowed halls of multiply published authors.
Hmm, your new picture, peering over your glasses just screams: MOLECULES! Bwahahaha! Have you seen this 50 second clip? Bwahahaha!
Hahaha! The best thing about wearing glasses is using it as a prop when giving my kids “the eye” by perring over my glasses, or using them to emphasize my point by pointing with them. Oh, and I do use them to see things better sometimes…
Molecules! Ha!
Can’t wait for the next one, Ned. Congrats on the contract!
Thanks so much, Robyn, and especially for all your incredible support 😉
Ha ha ha, Paul. I use that move all. the. time. I am so hot! LOL I’m sure Ned tries… 😉
Ooooo Robyn, you use that move too? You are giving me goosebumps – MOLECULES! Bwahaha!
Hahahaa…
Congratulations Ned!
“Out of respect for readers in Canada, their bookmark will actually be a thin circle of ham” – Hahaha 😀 And for the vegetarian readers, what do they get? Soy bacon? A piece of lettuce?
Hahaha! Either a bacon-scented air freshener or a fruit roll-up?
Congratulations!
“His real name is Edward? Hahahaha!”
Well, I am totally Team Jacob all the way, but I may have to make an exception in your case. 🙂
Awww, thanks for your consideration. Even without the abs 😉
Congrats! And there is nothing wrong with the name Edward. 🙂
Hahaha! Thanks, grannyK 😉
Pfft… I’m only here for the thong…
Ha! I’d say join the club, but there has to be a membership first 😉
Member ship, you say? Never thought of the thong quite in that way before… 😉
Hahaha! Hopefully there’ll be no need to abandon ship! 😉
Congratulations! I need to buy your first book. I’ve been cheap and only read you online so far. Your fault, there is a lot of material. Oh p.s. My first crush ever was Edward. Well, Eddie.
Hey, reading is reading. Either way, I always really appreciate your support and kind words.
And Eddie was what I went by growing up.
I will remedy that very soon. I’d like the book on my shelf plus I think hubby would get a kick out of your humour. I showed him a couple of your videos.
I was in fifth grade, and he was so cute ^_^
If you do order a copy from Port Hole Book instead of Amazon, let them know you want me to sign it — I’d be happy to do that 😉
And yeah, fifth grade seems to be when the magic starts to happen…
woo-hoo!
Congratulations on the new book! I am so excited for you! Go Team Nedward!
(Wears ‘Team Nedward’ shirt proudly)
I look forward to celebrating with you tonight!
xxx ❤ xxx
So much fo the shirt… *ahem*
Congratulations! But looking at the contract, I see that the publisher is planning to publish a different book, called “Title Pending”, which sounds like some sort of mystery novel about some real estate lawyer. I can say I’m already intrigued.
So am I!
Woo hoo! Congrats!! 🙂
Thanks, Alex!!
Congrats! 🙂
Sigh. 1J1 di you not read Mrs. Ned’s comment? Ned will be busy tonight….Nudge, Nudge, Wink Wink. ha!
Nudge, nudge. Wink, wink is right!
😉
😀
Just so we’re clear, this will not be anything like “The Nudge-Wink Report.”
MOLECULES!
MOLECULES = Friction!
Careful, that’s powerful stuff – that could get you dragged away by your better half. She’ll want everything off but the glasses, so be prepared. 😀
I’m counting on that…
Looking forward to reading both books!
Congratulations, Ned! Well done! 🙂 (btw, Edward is a great name)
Thanks, Lynette (for both) 😉
Congratulations on the book deal. But I must say that picture contains the biggest shit-eating grin I have seen in years. But I guess you’d have to be Texan to understand this comment.. Ok, I’ll go stomp over to Cowtown now.
HaHaHaHa! I lived in Dallas for 6 years, so I’ll be wating over at Cowtown for you 😉
Woohoo!
You should write a romance guide: “Bedward With Edward.” Or maybe that’s a kids book.
I think it sounds more like a “How you have kids” book. No pop-ups, I swear.
Your name could have been Nedward.
No bacon for Canadians? But we’re famous for our bacon; it even made it into a Brad Paisley song. Coincidentally, I’m eating bacon and farm fresh eggs right now.
On a slightly more serious note: Congratulations!
When I was a kid, everyone called me Eddie. When my grandmother called me “Edward,” I knew I was in trouble. Then I went by Ed when I was in middle school. When we moved to Oregon and I started high school, I decided to go by Ned and it’s been that name ever since. If I start going by Nedward, you’ll know I’ve started another phase of my life… and by that I mean the afterlife 😉
And thanks, Diane! Although eating those farm-fresh eggs and bacon was really rubbing it in… 😉
You’re my hero, Ned Hickson.
And yes, you can put that on your dust jacket…
Between yours and Ross’s testimonials on the book jacket, who could possibly resist buying it? (Don’t answer that. Just let me live the dream a while longer…)
Compared to me, Ned, you are living the dream, trust me.
Ironically, it’s the same dream my editor calls her nightmare…
Another zinger.
You can’t just let me wallow in my misery, can you?