I’m not sure what my parents were thinking when they had sex 50 years and 9 months ago.
Actually I guess I do, and well… Ewwww.
Anyway, if they had stopped just long enough to glance at a calander for 2016, they would’ve CLEARLY seen that my 50th birthday would probably fall on a work day. And a deadline day no less! Not that they could’ve know that. But why even take the chance?
With a little planning, and some restraint for God’s sake, they could’ve avoided putting me in this situation.
Even our local doughnut shop got in on the act by making this…
That’s right. A black doughnut. I mean, I don’t even know how you’d make that without witchcraft or a terrible accident. But hey, there’s bacon on it so who cares?
Would this be happening if my birthday was on a weekend? I don’t think so. Will this keep me from having a stiff drink before 5 p.m.? Again, I don’t think so.
The one upside is that, being reporters, we don’t do math very well. As a result, my official youth death certificate is actually 10 years off…
I was born in 1966. And yes, I plan to start using this as my official birth certificate. Unless there’s a senior discount involved.
All joking aside, I’m lucky to work with — and live in a town with — so many truly terrific people. I may be 50 today (or 40, depending on your source), but thanks to the people in my life I never think of my age in terms of a number. I’m blessed with a family that allows me to be who I am. Even when we leave the house together.
Looking back on my 40s, it was by far the best decade of my life.
So far, anyway.
I have every reason to believe the next 10 will be even better. Especially since, unlike my 40s, this decade will actually have some good Star Wars movies.
I guess what I’m saying is: Thanks, Mom and Dad. Your timing couldn’t have been more perfect.
I also want to thank all of you for being part of the community that means so much to me. You are part of the reason I wake each day inspired and living each moment young in spirit. Especially if you’re actually older than me…