Three more examples of why our newsroom has a Door

image Don’t bother giving your coffee an extra stir, or rubbing your eyes in disbelief, because you read it right! This week’s retrospective of The Door is offering THREE … Three…three (that’s an echo) examples of journalistic Shame, Blame and Brilliance!

For those of you knocking on The Door for the first time…

Go Away!

Haha! Just kidding! The more the merrier! In fact, “the more the merrier” is what the fire marshal has deemed to be the maximum occupancy level in our newsroom, depending on whether anyone in the group has eaten lunch at the Enfermo Taco.

Before we begin, as always, we must join hands and repeat the following mantra in a slow, monotoned voice similar to any character played by Kristen Stewart:

The Door serves as a beacon, drawing us into the jagged rocks of journalism.

OK, come with me now as we go back in time through The Door, where journalists here at Siuslaw News have been taping and gluing their favorite newspaper faux pas since the 1970s.

This week, we begin with a fellow Oregon coast newspaper — The World — which seemed, like a lot of newspapers back in 1994, to have rediscovered the word “probe,” and how it can be used as an action word or noun, depending on how it’s, um… inserted. And while most newspapers “probed” sparingly, The World appeared to relish any opportunity for a good probing. As you will see, this is actually a collection of headlines that appeared in The World all in the same week — earning it a hallowed place on The Door.

If anyone from The World is reading this, please try not to be sore.
If anyone from The World is reading this, please try not to be sore.

To be fair, we at Siuslaw News aren’t infallible. It’s just that our infallibility doesn’t involve any probing.

Exhibit A: Below is the work of yours truly. Needless to say, I had some explaining to do. I just thought it was worth noting that, in a town where half of the population is made up of retirees, no one had died since Friday. WOW! Sadly, my editor didn’t share my enthusiasm…


Exhibit B: Because the reporter who pieced together this brilliant work of investigative journalism is still here, I will refrain from using Ryan Cronk’s name. Not that he’d mind, especially since he’s on vacation this week…


And there you have it! Tune in again next Wednesday for the final installment in this month-long retrospective of our newsroom door, assuming my editor hasn’t replaced my computer with an air conditioning unit…



(Ned Hickson is a syndicated columnist with News Media Corporation. His first book, Humor at the Speed of Life, is available from Port Hole Publications, or Barnes & Noble.)

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Ned's Blog

I was a journalist, humor columnist, writer and editor at Siuslaw News for 23 years. The next chapter in my own writer’s journey is helping other writers prepare their manuscript for the road ahead. I'm married to the perfect woman, have four great kids, and a tenuous grip on my sanity...

26 thoughts on “Three more examples of why our newsroom has a Door”

  1. Never mind the shoppers shopping at shops. I want to know what that poodle was fixing to do! I think the obit is to be celebrated. Maybe you should have ended it with “Yay!” ?

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