Big screen premiere of ‘The Nedinator’ blamed for drop in thong sales

Poster design by Adam Sendek. Because he rocks.
Poster design by Adam Sendek. Because he rocks.
The lights went down, the curtains parted and theater-goers at City Lights Cinemas who had come to witness the premiere of Terminator: Genisys were also the first to witness me in a red thong.

I should clarify that this was for the big-screen premiere of a 6-minute spoof, Terminator: Nedisys.

As you might expect, the consensus from audience members was very positive…

“I laughed. I cried. I called my lawyer.”

“TWO THUMBS UP! But I’d rather not say where.”

“Any chance a Terminator will travel through time to make sure this movie never happened?”

“I really wish I’d held off on getting those corrective lenses.”

In all seriousness, what you see of me in a thong is extremely small. I mean, when compared to the film’s overall length. *sigh* I’m just saying don’t let my being in a thong scare you off, because it’s very tiny.

The scene, not…


Anyway, our friends over at Long Awkward Pause have posted what you might call the “Special Edition Boxed Set” version of Terminator: Nedisys, which includes the first promo clip, the “Nedinator in 30 seconds” version, the full-length feature AND a special making-of look at special effects on a $12.98 budget.

Be among the first to see all four and we’ll send you this special collector’s edition container of fried rice!

Actual fried rice and logo not included
Actual fried rice and logo not included

What are you waiting for? Your boss won’t mind! And once he sees my red thong, he’ll never ask you to work overtime again… See you over at Long Awkward Pause!

Or watch them on the “big screen” at home by YouTubing me! (Wait… that sounds wrong)



(Ned Hickson is a syndicated columnist with News Media Corporation. Still looking for that perfect book for summer reading? Ned’s first book, Humor at the Speed of Life,available from Port Hole Publications, or Barnes & Noble. Disclaimer: Even if you buy Ned’s book for summer reading, you should still use sunscreen.)

Published by

Ned's Blog

I was a journalist, humor columnist, writer and editor at Siuslaw News for 23 years. The next chapter in my own writerโ€™s journey is helping other writers prepare their manuscript for the road ahead. I'm married to the perfect woman, have four great kids, and a tenuous grip on my sanity...

39 thoughts on “Big screen premiere of ‘The Nedinator’ blamed for drop in thong sales”

    1. Hahaha! We took our kids (3 teens) to see “Terminator: Genisys” last night and didn’t tell them this was going to be shown first. I’m pretty sure our daughter is going to runaway now…

  1. marketing suggestion: special collectorโ€™s edition container with thong enclosed! ๐Ÿ™‚

  2. The Nedinator -I’m speechless.

    Too funny that your teens were surprised – love getting even with them occasionally. Well done! (video and teen revenge)

  3. Absolutely made my day! Still sniggling to myself. I have to admit I didn’t notice the thong at first, but I would think men everywhere will be clamoring to the nearest VS for one! I especially love the wifebeater outlined sunburn. May I request your next film be a tribute to Pornstashe?

    1. Thanks so much, and I especially want to thank you for adding “sniggling” to my vocabulary!

      In the meantime, I’ll get to work on my pornstache film ๐Ÿ˜‰

  4. No wonder my order kept returning to me with the words “out of stock”
    This whole series has put a huge smile on my face and been solely responsible for a permanent belly ache induced by true laughing out loud!.
    Heading over to LAW – maybe they can help me out with my backordered, er, items.

        1. I sent it with a money-back-guarantee it would be delivered in a timeliness considered the standard by most third-world countries. So I’m sure it’ll be there any day now…

No one is watching, I swear...

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in: Logo

You are commenting using your account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s