It’s time for change in politics (unless you’re wearing a diaper)

As I mentioned Friday, as a candidate representing the new Dempublican Party, I am running for President of the United States.

Tonight.

No, you didn’t pull a VanWinkle and sleep through the last year while watching reruns of The Kardashians. My campaign is part of this week’s challenge to win “Performer of the Year” in The Public Blogger’s A Star is Born competition. Think of it as The Oscars of the blogging world meets The Apprentice, then gets dropped into Hell’s Kitchen — except hosted by Ryan Seacrest.

Unbeknownst (I can mark that word off my bucket list now) to us, the competition actually began months ago with 700 bloggers from around the world, all of whom were judged by an “Inner Circle” of panelists based on our individual artistic merits.

Yes, I see your mouth has dropped open much like mine, but I assure you my inclusion as the only humorist to reach the final 12 wasn’t a mistake. And if it was, it’s too late now. I already bought stationary and I’m not taking it back. 

Each week, we have been issued a new artistic challenge — from poetry to expressing raw emotion (I just had to think about bacon) — with one of us being eliminated each week through scoring based on public voting, a judges panel, the “Inner Circle” and a public proxy vote . The competition is now in week seven and down to the Final Four — with one of us being eliminated after voting ends tomorrow morning (Dec. 7) at 10 a.m. (PST).

For this week’s challenge we were given Cart Blanche, which I’m hoping will improve my credit score. We were also required to create and demonstrate a true collaboration with other artists for our submission. I was lucky enough to get fellow humorist Stephanie Lewis and hip-hop recording artist Kendrick Merk Nichelson. To make a long story short, we decided the best way to pool our resources in a collaboration was to start a new political party: The Dempublicans.

I promise it will all make sense (but remember, this is politics afterall) if you click on the icon below and follow it to tonight’s performance at The Public Blogger. While you’re there, please vote for one of the four artists by going to the “voting booth” at the bottom of the page, choosing an artist and pushing the “vote” button.

By the way, have I told you I have a small cough that I think might be fatal? But please, don’t let the fact that I may not make it through the night influence your vote.

*cough*

In all seriousness, I have been No. 1 for four out of five weeks thanks in large part to your incredible support and encouragement. This competition has become much more intense and complex than I anticipated, but your supportive comments and emails, as well as your continued support in voting, has really meant a lot — and been truly inspiring.

Thanks so much for that.

Voting in this round continues until 10 a.m. (PST) Monday, with final results — and elimination — announced at noon. I will keep you posted as updates are released. Or escape. Or are leaked.

In the meantime, here’s the link if you’d like to find out more about The Dempublican Party, as well as see the work of the three other nominees for this week — and please: vote for someone.

*cough*